Pause~Selah

pause-button

Wait a minute.  Take a breath.  Reflect.  Think about it.  That’s what comes to my mind when I hear the word “pause”.

However, in my real life world, of go-go-go, it’s something I rarely do.  Until the beginning of this year.  Suddenly my whole life came to a pause, when my husband became very sick with a staph infection.  His illness immobilized him due to the infection becomimg seeded in his spine which came through an  open wound on his foot.  What started out as excitement to undergo cataract surgery, became his admitance to the Emergency Room. He became hospitalized (7 days), then transferred to a skilled nursing facility (30 days), and then finally home to “Lani’s Home Health Care” (60 days).  My very active life, filled with roles and responisbilities came to a screeching halt.  To me it felt like I gave birth to a newborn.  My entire focus had to be on taking care of him in every way that we take for granted daily.

At first it felt like I had died.  I didn’t know how to pause-sit still, and reflect, and I found myself not breathing.  The stress of the unknown’s began to fill my mind and heart.  It was very touch and go at some points as the staph infection compromised many of his body’s operating systems.  I don’t wish that kind of pause on anyone.

However, in the days that passed, I found it comforting that each day I could spend more time with God reading my Bible, pondering on his promises to me and worshipping him.  I became challenged in my thoughts, having time to think if what I preach is what I believe.  I do!   Little did I know that this time of suffering through illness, lead us to our most intitmate moments with our Creator.

In hindsight I offer this nugget of wisdom.  Don’t wait for circumstances to happen to you to take a pause in your life.  Practice the presence of God daily.  Pause and let him speak to you about your future.  I find that writing my thoughts and prayers to God in a journal, and then waiting to hear what he says to me, then recording his message from pen to paper does wonders for those uncertain times in your life.  He is waiting for you to come into his presence, experience his power, and see his provision.

Pause.  Breathe.

Isaiah 41:10
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.